Must Read: Natural Parenting Top Ten

Welcome to the March Carnival of Natural Parenting: Natural Parenting Top 10 Lists This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have shared Top 10 lists on a wide variety of aspects of attachment parenting and natural living. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

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In a lot of ways, my parenting philosophy happens to align with the principles of Attachment Parenting. The first principle is Prepare for Pregnancy, Birth, and Parenting:

Become emotionally and physically prepared for pregnancy and birth. Research available options for health care providers and birthing environments, and become informed about routine newborn care. Continuously educate yourself about developmental stages of childhood, setting realistic expectations and remaining flexible.

I did a lot of my preparation for pregnancy, birth, and parenting (and continue to) through reading. Because of that, I'd like to share my top ten (or so) favorite books that I've enjoyed reading (so far) in my preparation for pregnancy, birth, and parenting. I've added a brief description of why I like the book and, in some cases, a quote or two from the book. Here they are:

1. Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin, CPM: I love this book! I like how the first half is birth stories, and then the second half is about the "essentials of birth," explaining the physiology of birth, outlining the tests and medical procedures you might encounter, and emphasizing the mind/body connection. I like that she cites her sources at the end of each chapter for easy reference. A couple of my favorite quotes:

   "Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body."

   "Men take it for granted that their sexual organs can greatly increase in size and then become small again without being ruined. ...[O]bstetricians of earlier generations planted the idea (which is still widely held) that nature cheated women when it came to the tissues of the vagina and perineum (give it one good stretch, and it's done for, like a cheap girdle), and a lot of women have bought the idea that their crotches are made of shoddy goods."

   (For more amazing birth stories from Ina May Gaskin's births on The Farm, read Spiritual Midwifery.)
2. At least one of these (if not all): The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer, Your Best Birth by Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein, or Birth: The Surprising History of How We Are Born by Tina Cassidy: I like all of these books as ways to learn about your options and empower you to be an informed and involved participant in your health care. However, I wouldn't recommend reading Birth: The Surprising History of How We Are Born while pregnant, since it explores some pretty dark times in the history of obstetric care, and might not be the best thing to be filling your mind with during pregnancy (just my opinion).

   From Your Best Birth: "...[B]ecause this is your baby, it's up to you to decide what kind of birth is best for you—even if it's different from the type your sister, cousin, or best friend had. It could even be the type of birth that your OB-GYN hasn't initially suggested to you. Your best birth is one where you feel empowered because you know all your options and are confident in the decisions you have made about the birth."

3. Birthing From Within by Pam England CNM, MA and Rob Horowitz, Ph.D: I love this book because it focuses on preparing your mind and spirit, your partnership and your home for the birth of your baby. I found pregnancy to be a time of deep introspection and self-reflection, and this book helped me on that journey. Sections include: The Art of Birthing, Being Powerful in Birth, Birthing Through Pain, and Gestating Parenthood. There are lots of exercises (reflective writing, drawing, etc.) throughout the book, and they're not just for pregnant women. I actually read this book the first time when I was completing my labor doula training, and I found it very useful in that application, too.
4. The Pregnant Woman's Comfort Book: A Self-Nurturing Guide to Your Emotional Well-Being During Pregnancy and Early Motherhood by Jennifer Louden: The title pretty much says it all. This book is aimed at self-care for the pregnant woman and new mother. I used this book more like a workbook, using a blank notebook with it to go through the reflective exercises and write down any thoughts that came up while reading.
5. The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, 8th Ed. by La Leche League International: This a classic and wonderfully comprehensive breastfeeding guide. It covers everything from nesting, birth, latching and early attachment, and the early weeks, to solid foods introduction, breastfeeding toddlers, pumping and alternative feeding routes, and weaning. The first edition was published in 1958, and what else can I say? A book that's been around that long and remained popular and relevant is a must-read.
6. Bestfeeding: How to Breastfeed Your Baby by Mary Renfrew, Chloe Fisher, and Suzanne Arms: I like this book so much because it's an easy read, and it has lots of wonderful photographs of breastfeeding pairs. Breastfeeding is a learned skill, and in much of the Western world right now, it isn't something we grow up seeing all the women around us doing. The book covers breastfeeding basics, solutions to common (and less common) problems, and tons of great photographs.

   "Successful breastfeeding must become the respected and honored norm for women today. When it does, many more people will gain confidence in the fact that women's bodies work, and that babies are the best judge of their own food intake"

7. The Baby Book: Everything You Need to Know About Your Baby From Birth to Age Two by William Sears, MD and Martha Sears, MD: The quintessential book about infancy and babyhood. I use this book more as a reference book, looking up things when I'm curious, instead of reading it cover-to-cover (all 675 pages of it!). I like all of the child development information in the later chapters. I also appreciate that there is honest and balanced information included about circumcision. This book is also geared toward promoting healthy attachment through the early stages of your baby's life. It is also inclusive of cloth diapering, co-sleeping, babywearing and other natural parenting practices. (And, of course, William and Martha Sears have written a bunch of other great books that I could put on this list, too.)
8. Brain Rules for Baby: How to Raise a Smart and Happy Child from Zero to Five by John Medina: This is a fascinating scientific (but not difficult to read) look at child brain development from its beginnings in utero until age five, and most importantly, what we can do as parents to provide the best environment for our kids' brains to grow. He emphasizes the need for lots of face-to-face time, he explains why we should limit screen time for little ones, he encourages talking to kids—a lot. He discusses intelligence and IQ, discipline and spanking, fussiness and morality. At the end of each chapter, there are lists of key points for you to review. One of the things I like best about this book is that John Medina stresses that a safe, loving, nurturing environment is the most important aspect of helping your child's neurological development.

   "Intelligence is not developed in the crucibles of machines, but in the arms of warm, loving people."

9. The Attachment Connection: Parenting a Secure and Confident Child Using the Science of Attachment Theory by Ruth P. Newton, Ph.D: This book is all about attachment theory (not attachment parenting, which can be easy to confuse). It discusses how to foster your child's secure attachment using findings from attachment theory research. The author stresses the importance of focusing primarily on your child's emotional development during the early years. She explains the difference between the types of attachments (secure, insecure-avoidant, and insecure-ambivalent) and explains how we should be striving to be "good enough" parents.

   "Raising secure, emotionally competent, cooperative children who have full access to their creativity and expression is desperately needed for the health of the human race and the health of the planet. Raising secure children matters."

10. Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason by Alfie Kohn: This book is about positive or gentle discipline, about working with our children instead of trying to control them. I really believe Alfie Kohn is right on about how we shouldn't place value judgments on our kids' actions, but rather seek to provide them with unconditional love (and the research supports this concept). Then, when things are going wrong, we should try to discover what they are really needing in a situation instead of withdrawing love, affection, and attention from them in those moments.

    "Lots of people believe that when any individual, even a small child, does something bad, then something bad should be done to that individual in return.... Never mind whether punishment works, whether it teaches any desirable lessons or has any constructive effects on children's values or behaviors. Many parents continue to use it because they see punishment as a moral imperative. Indeed, you have to swim against the tide in our culture if you chose to respond to children's misbehavior in any way other than by imposing an unpleasant consequence."

I've enjoyed making this list, and it's making me want to go back and re-read several of these books again! Tell me, what are some of your favorites? What books would be on your list?

Disclosure: Amazon links are affiliate links.
Please see my full disclosure policy here. 

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Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:
(This list will be live and updated by afternoon March 8 with all the carnival links.)

• Attachment Parenting in the NICU — Erica at ChildOrganics shares some strategies to help you parent naturally in some unnatural circumstances.
• 10 Reasons to Choose Baby Led Weaning — Luschka from Diary of a First Child shares ten reasons to choose Baby Led Weaning when it comes to solids.
• Choosing to Breastfeed — From selfishness to self-giving, CatholicMommy at Working to be Worthy lists reasons why breast is best for her and her family.
• Ten Things I Wish I Knew About Before Little Man — In this reflective post, The ArstyMama discusses ten things she wishes she knew more about before the birth of her son, Little Man.
• 10 Things That Helped Me Become a Natural Mama — The Accidental Natural Mama counts down ten things that helped her find her moderately crunchy inner mama self.
• Top 10 Reasons to Breastfeed Your Toddler — Extended breast-feeder Kate Wicker of Momopoly makes her own top 10 list for why she loves nursing her 2-year-old.
• Top 10 Tips on Authentic Grandparenting — Mamapoekie of Authentic Parenting offers a list of tips to make the grandparent-parent-child relationship flow smoothly.
• Top Ten "Dad" Things — Liam at In The Now talks about his favourite ways to spend time with his children.
• Top 10 Natural Strategies for Conception (aka How to Get Pregnant!) — Despite facing plenty of health issues, Jessica Claire at Crunchy-Chewy Mama found her way to two first-try pregnancies thanks to these natural strategies.
• Top Ten Reasons Why Home Birth Rocks — Lucy at Dreaming Aloud shares her passion for birthing at home - the natural place for natural birth.
• Top 10 reasons why cloth nappies are fun — Tat at Cloth Nappies Are Fun shows how using cloth nappies can brighten up your day.
• Top Ten Ways to Be Present With Family — Amy at Innate Wholeness shares how to make the most of parenting and family life through being present.
• Top 10 Things In My Arsenal of Kitchen Witchy Mama Tricks. — Joni Rae at Tales of A Kitchen Witch shares with us the simple things she would never want to be missing from her cupboards.
• Top 10 ways I'm not very good at natural parenting (and why I keep trying anyway) — Jenny at Babyfingers shares the ways she is imperfect as a natural parent, and why she embraces natural parenting anyway.
• Top 10 Ways to Know You Are a Natural Parent — So what makes us "natural parents," anyway? A lighthearted look at the Top 10 Ways to Know You Are a Natural Parent by the editors and readers of Natural Parents Network.
• The Top 10 Things Every Natural Household (with children) Should Have — Amanda at Let's Take the Metro shares a list of the most common natural products and remedies she uses for health and cleaning.
• Top 10 books for raising loving, spiritual children — In her 'food for the soul' post, Mrs Green from Little Green Blog shares her favourite spiritual books. No matter what religion you practise, there's something for everyone!
• Top 10 Things No One Told Me About Natural Parenting — Adrienne at Mommying My Way explains that the best things about natural parenting are things she never expected.
• Top 10 Flower Essences for Families — Kim of Nature Baby Bloggings lists her pick of the top ten flower essence which can help ease families through the ups and downs of life.
• My Top Ten Parenting Tools — Amyables at Toddler In Tow names the top ten tools that have been helpful to her while learning to parent respectfully and successfully.
• Ten Ways Families Can Enjoy Nature (for free!) — Spring is nearly in the air, and Jenn at Monkey Butt Junction is dreaming of the fun and frugal ways that her family is going to get out and enjoy nature this summer.
• 10 Reasons We Unschool — Patti at Jazzy Mama explains why unschooling is the right choice for her family.
• Must Read: Natural Parenting Top Ten — Amy at Anktangle wants you to do a little reading! She shares her top ten favorite books to help parents prepare for pregnancy, birth, and parenting.
• Top 10 Breastfeeding Misconceptions — Sheila at A Gift Universe examines ten reasons women give for why they didn't breastfeed as long as they wanted, and shows how these obstacles can be overcome.
• Ten Reasons to Plan a Home Birth — Since a home birth can be an incredibly empowering experience, Leslie at Lights and Letters outlines ten reasons why you should plan to have your baby at home.
• Top Ten Books for Birth, Breastfeeding and Parenting — Megan at Just Me(gan) writes about the ten books that have helped her the most in her natural parenting journey.
• A Top Ten Letter To Me... — Kat at Loving {Almost} Every Moment writes herself a letter of reflections and bits of wisdom she would have liked to know as a new mama.
• Top Ten Mama Necessities Money Can't Buy — Buying baby gear is fun, but Emily at Crunchy(ish) Mama knows real parenting must-haves can't be bought in stores (or even on Amazon).
• Top 10 Books for a Natural Mum — Isil at Smiling like Sunshine talks about her Top 10 Books for a Natural Mum.
• Ten Great Spring Activities To Do With Preschoolers — Kellie at Our Mindful Life and her family have come up with a great list of activities to do together this spring.
• 10 Ways to Reuse Yogurt Containers — Acacia at Fingerpaint & Superheroes keeps the stacks of yogurt containers out of her recycling bin by reusing them in both practical and creative ways.
• Top Ten Ways To Have a Harmonious Home — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama shares her natural parenting-inspired methods for maintaining a harmonious daily life with her toddler.
• 10 Natural Baby Items I Love — Charise at I Thought I Knew Mama shares product ideas to support your natural parenting.
• The Pandas' Top Five Crunch-osophies — Top five crunchy philosophies, as employed at the Panda Residence by Ana at Pandamoly.
• Top 10 Reasons to Leave Your Son Intact — Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children has shared 10 reasons why you should leave your newborn son intact.
• Ten things everyone should know about unassisted homebirth — Olivia at Write About Birth shares practical tips for women considering an unassisted homebirth and debunks some common myths
• 10 Most Popular Ways To Treat Cloth Diaper Stains — Chante at My Natural Motherhood Journey gives ten easy tips to make your diapers like new.
• 10 Lessons in 1 Year — Abbie at Farmer's Daughter shares 10 parenting lessons that she has learned throughout her first year of motherhood.
• Top 10 Ways to Get Breastfeeding Off To a Good Start — Sheryl at Little Snowflakes shares 10 effective ways to ensure breastfeeding gets off to a good start.
• Top 10 Ways to Avoid a Time-Out — If you are uncomfortable using time-outs in an attempt to control your child's behavior, try one of these gentler alternatives. Dionna at Code Name: Mama shares her Top 10 Ways to Avoid a Time-Out.
• My Top 10 Parenting Scriptures — Dulce de leche is learning to integrate faith and parenting. Whether it is breastfeeding, babywearing, comforting her children, or gentle discipline, she finds that the Bible has beautiful passages to encourage her on her journey.
• Natural Cleaning Ideas - Top 10 — Laura at Laura's Blog lists the ways she keeps her house clean and clear of chemicals.
• My Top Ten (plus two) Life Altering and Growth Inspiring Books — A top ten list of books from MJ at Wander Wonder Discover that changed her life as an individual, a parent, and an earth dweller.
• Top 10 Ways to Use Natural Parenting for Children with Special Needs — Danielle at Mommy Makes Cents feeds the needs of her family and special needs child through the use of Natural Parenting.
• Ten Fundamentals — Seonaid at The Practical Dilettante gets philosophical with a list of the fundamentals that drive her natural parenting.
• 10 reasons why I chose breast over bottles — Becky at Old New Legacy writes a quick list of why she chose breast over bottles.
• Top Ten Natural Tools for the Work of Play — Lori at Beneath the Rowan Tree offers insight into 10 natural toys that will span the early years (and save you money).
• 10 differences between pregnancy and parenting in Japan and the US — Megan at Ichigo Means Strawberry gives her impressions about differences in pregnancy and parenting in Japan and the US.
• Natural Parenting Benny and Bex Style — Pecky at Benny and Bex explains why Natural Parenting principles work best for her boys.
• Top 10 Reasons to Co-Sleep — 10 practical, emotional, and completely selfish reasons to co-sleep and share a family bed from Lily, aka Witch Mom.
• My Top Ten New Mommy Moments — Melissa at The New Mommy Files recounts the ten most memorable moments of her daughter's first year.
• Top Ten Things Every Breastfeeding Mother Needs to Know — Kristen at Adventures in Mommyhood believes knowledge is power and wants all moms to be well informed.
• Top 10 Nursing Positions / Situations — Momma Jorje uses her 5½ years of nursing experience to share her Top 10 Nursing Positions/Situations. She includes some adorable photos of her youngest daughter at the breast.
• Ten Top Ways to Connect Kids with Nature — Terri from Child at the Nature Isle offers 10 ways to immerse ourselves in the natural world and develop a love affair with the Earth.
• Top 10 Slacker Ways to Natural Parent — Guavalicious is happy to show you how to parent naturally the slacker way.
• Simply what it looks like — Andrea!!! from Ella-Bean & Co. offers a glimpse into natural parenting through the eyes of mama and babe.
• Top Ten Reasons Why Natural Parenting Dads Are So Attractive — Nada at miniMOMist sure digs her husband, but it's not just his good looks -- it's his parenting!
• 10 Family Systems and Routines That Work for Us — See what routines, organizational systems, and parenting approaches work for Kristin at Intrepid Murmurings to help avoid conflict and maintain sanity in a family with three young children.
• Top 10 reasons to choose midwifery care — Lauren at Hobo Mama lists the features that drew her to midwives' care for pregnancy and birth.
• 10 Ways to Cloth Diaper on a Budget — Michelle at The Parent Vortex shares her best thrifty cloth diapering tips.
• Ten Reasons it Felt Sew Good To Make My Own Play Food — Brittany at Mama's Felt Cafe lists her 10 (OK, 11) favorite reasons to grab a needle and start sewing your own felt play toys.
• Top10 Ways to Spark Interest, Learn, and Have Fun With Everyday Tasks! — Bethy at Bounce Me to the Moon gives you her top 10 ways of incorporating fun and lessons into everyday tasks and chores.
• Postpartum Gift Ideas — Alicia at I Found My Feet suggests a top 10 list of gifts for mother's after giving birth.
• My Top Ten Shows Worthy Of Screen Time — Tree at Mom Grooves shares her top ten list of shows that she believes are positive, educational, kind, joyful, and a nice way to share some downtime with your children.
• The Top 10 Ways to Succeed as an Working Attachment Parent — That Mama Gretchen shares tried and true ways to succeed with attachment parenting even when working away from home during the day.
• Top Ten Books for Natural Parenting — Pregnancy, herbs, cooking, and healthcare the ten books Asha at Meta Mom the most.
• Preparing for a Hospital VBAC: My Top 10 — Thomasin at Propson Palingenesis shares 10 ways she's preparing for her upcoming hospital VBAC.
• Top Ten New Mom Survival Tools — Wolfmother shares her most beloved motherhood survival tools at Fabulous Mama Chronicles.
• Top 10 Montessori Principles for Natural Learning — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now gives her top 10 list of Montessori principles parents can use to encourage their children s natural learning.
• Going Granola — Tashmica from The Mother Flippin' Blog describes the 10 ways that natural parenting sneaked up on her. She never expected to go all granola on the world.
• Step Away From the Amazon List — Stefanie at Very, Very Fine wishes she hadn't bought so much useless stuff.